Divorce Parties

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Jack and Jill decided to have their divorce before marriage so they can get it over with and spend the rest of their life together while living 5,000 miles apart blocking each other on facebook.

Jack and Jill decided to have their divorce before marriage so they can get it over with and spend the rest of their life together while living 5,000 miles apart blocking each other on Facebook. They bought condoms and a ring with no intention of using them other than using the psychological trick of throwing away objects they resent.

People have recently begun celebrating divorce as a new beginning to life after being wedded by the OpenSource Temple at multikulti. Divorce parties are popping up all over town, you may just be invited! “Why not” says Jay Dymzaduzen, “we’ve been unhappily married for 23 years and now we can finally move on with our lives.” People are realizing that instead of wasting all their life savings on expensive lawyers and court fees, they would rather just blow all the money away in one night of lavish partying at multikulti. “Might as well, you can’t get a divorce nowadays without spending your entire life savings on attorneys, so when we realized that we are going to go bankrupt either way, we decided we might as well have a good time and throw one last bash for old times sake.” This new phenomena is being seen as a new way to bring all the old friends and family together for better or worse and celebrate the freedom we have to start over in riches…and in debt. When coming face to face with an archaic court system that works to rob troubled families of every nickel and dime by infusing more conflict, who wouldn’t rather throw away their children’s college money on one last incredible party? Newly divorced couples who have hosted these extravagant events have been raving that it is a far better approach than spending weeks and months on end battling out these problems in the court with boring tight ass lawyers who will just keep getting continuance after continuance to ensure they are getting paid to no end. Who want’s to do that? Might as well get it all over in one all night shabang.

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