Ascends from Saturn, a human being runs for President…

Nov 07, 16 Ascends from Saturn, a human being runs for President…

Sid, the human conspiracy on the reptilian dominated Saturn returns to Earth to help in his presidency eradicate the infestation.
Sid, the human conspiracy on the reptilian dominated Saturn returns to Earth to help in his presidency eradicate the infestation.
So if you are not thinking about voting, do it anyways just to write Sid in. He can sure use a human kicking him to the oval office. No reptilian will vote for him or their sheeple. So we need to rally all the intelligent folks that wouldn’t otherwise vote.

The reptilian media establishment had cut the debate short between Sid, Trump and Clinton. Supposedly, unconfirmed reports that Weird Al will be the substitute to Sid’s hand on the bible. Conspiracy theories have gone wild about where Sid will be asked to place his hand. Hopefully it will be kid and sheeple safe.

read more

Goat Cubs!

Oct 22, 16 Goat Cubs!

If we all went too far, maybe just maybe that will compel us all to be closer with one another as companions and just maybe then that would result in actions that will keep this Earth, and all that it shares over our heads, safe and sound.

read more

Acid Clown Jazz USA!

Oct 05, 16 Acid Clown Jazz USA!

The sedatives mummify the public’s group think mind in a wide spread experiment by the psychological operations of our military to see to what extent the mass population is ready for a virtual reality while the true reality becomes destroyed beneath this veil.

“It is a matter of how to transcend this reality to a fake one before we can just pull the plug on humanity”- Unconfirmed Agenda 42 operator.

read more

Drop-In Center for Cops to Help Curb Violence Across Cities

Sep 30, 16 Drop-In Center for Cops to Help Curb Violence Across Cities

Chicago is piloting a drop in center program for Police Officers in an effort to curb city-wide violence. The program introduces a mandatory group titled “Ask Questions First” to encourage officers to identify a situation first before reacting to it. Some officers are inclined to be prescribed the non-mandatory donut regimen which once in their system will curb physical reaction time to allow mental capacities to assess a situation while the physical reaction of their bodies catches up to react in hopes that their physical reactions coincide with their eventual final assessment of a given situation.

read more

Exodus Disproportion to Election Results

Mar 03, 16 Exodus Disproportion to Election Results

The polls have commenced. The stakes in the states have been Dumped. And Hillary is trying to steal Bernie’s claim to address this one single anomaly: More voters are leaving for Canada than those numbers claimed to have voted for Trump – and by no means by any small margin.

read more

Voting Won’t Matter, because I don’t care….

Feb 27, 15 Voting Won’t Matter, because I don’t care….

Bare not this scenario, for that Chuy is a man of steel and only high fructose corn syrup, fluoride and heavy metals can bring him down. He get’s his cilantro and onions from the people to keep his strength and deter Kryptonite, so vote on!

read more

Fracking Companies Now Sell Water and Fire From the Same Source

Jan 02, 15 Fracking Companies Now Sell Water and Fire From the Same Source

“People need water, and people need to heat their homes and cook their food” says Barnie Bushwhacker from the company Frack America USA. Now fracking companies have come up with an innovative way for people to get both these utilities right from the convenience of their kitchen or bathroom faucet. Through high pressured horizontal fracturing, natural gas companies are drilling in neighborhoods around the country to provide a unique service, allowing the methane gas trapped deep in the earth to seep into the aquifers where they can be utilized by residents. Residents are already showing excitement…”now i can light my tap water on fire!” said Jacob Haughney of North Dakota.

read more

The End is Near: MK Buys Fancy Toilet Paper for Everyone!

Jan 02, 15 The End is Near: MK Buys Fancy Toilet Paper for Everyone!

The Julian Calendar originally consisted of 10 months so some time has been unaccounted. The prophecy of the end of the world has been extended with this error accounted. Meanwhile, the end of multikulti is even more near.

read more

Potholes Repurposed

Oct 10, 14 Potholes Repurposed

The Mayor has dug a hole in the the city and the TIF’s budget when executing his ‘building a new Chicago,” that led him to think creatively to respond to the ever exponentially increasing pothole problem.

read more

China’s New Housing Initiative: Biodegradable for Cheap

Apr 24, 14 China’s New Housing Initiative: Biodegradable for Cheap

China is finally getting the idea of planned obsolescence from the greatest garbage producing nation in the world: America — only that China is taking an environmentally sound approach.

read more

The Garlic Get’s Environmentally Snotty

Mar 24, 14 The Garlic Get’s Environmentally Snotty

or the action: “Frack Your Nose: Diapers Optional (To Flick And Soil Our Future)” we invite you to pick-it, whatever golden idea you would like to rush and mock. We’ve run our course of peak snot imported from other countries and deep oceans and now we’re asking the United States government to extract resources from our bodies here at home. We’re presenting this to those major oil, coal and gas companies so they can comply with our own snot and allow this country to be resource Depends. Together we can make our future with these new promising resources to prosper generations to come. Masks will be provided to the first 20-some people who show up courtesy of URME & plastic see-thru gloves will be given away by Sid Yiddish.

read more

NSA Calls to God Intercepted by the Federation of Them

Mar 08, 14 NSA Calls to God Intercepted by the Federation of Them

The NSA learned today that all their communications had been compromised by They. In the effort to consolidate what “strategery” they had left they concluded either doing nothing or negotiating with Them on what ever plan they have in whatever it means to serve mankind.

read more

North Korea Tries to Wake Up America with Their Propaganda on American Propaganda

Mar 07, 14 North Korea Tries to Wake Up America with Their Propaganda on American Propaganda

North Korean starts a Youtube channel with an abundance of videos about their great leader. However North Korea recently drew into question with their expose of the use of propaganda in American mainstream media. We tried asking random people in the street for comment and everyone just scurried away thinking we were trying to sell them something.

read more

Peanut Skins Not Banned, Yet

Mar 06, 14 Peanut Skins Not Banned, Yet

The drug war’s Drug Enforcement Agitators recently gave up on enforcing anti-cannabis efforts with their statement “if we put all those dope heads in prison then the prison industrial complex would be making more in profits than the military industrial complex. We simply cannot afford that reputation.”

read more

Chicago Upgrades Computers from Windows 8 to Commodore 64

Mar 03, 14 Chicago Upgrades Computers from Windows 8 to Commodore 64

The Legacy Is Best computer group convinced the tech council and affiliates for the City of Chicago to revert back to 30 year old technology in order to get things done on time and make hack attacks virtually impossible. “We love the new system,” Dart replies. “I know that when I type a word that it will appear instantly and not have to wait for the computer to catch up to be ready for my input.”

read more

United States Post Office Makes Federal Reserve and Gold Irrelevant

Mar 02, 14 United States Post Office Makes Federal Reserve and Gold Irrelevant

The United States Post Office is now accepting all your Federal Reserve Notes in exchange for the new Debt Stamps. The new currency allows you to cover the cost of shipping packages on all sizes and weights with one cost matching stamp.

read more

Divorce Parties

Mar 01, 14 Divorce Parties

People have recently begun celebrating divorce as a new beginning to life after being wedded by the OpenSource Temple at multikulti. Divorce parties are popping up all over town, you may just be invited! “Why not” says Jay Dymzaduzen, “we’ve been unhappily married for 23 years and now we can finally move on with our lives.”

read more

TSA Announces Ball Sack Scanner

Feb 28, 14 TSA Announces Ball Sack Scanner

Criminal investigators discovered that every ball sack has a unique set of prints that can not be replicated, and which is even more reliable than the trusty old method of fingerprinting. With this new development, TSA is now planning on installing ball sack security scanners at designated checkpoints to provide the public with an added layer of safety and security.

read more

Kids Soon to Be Vaccinated for Cooties

Feb 24, 14 Kids Soon to Be Vaccinated for Cooties

FEMA confirms report of a massive cootie outbreak in schools across the US. Undercover officials working within the Department of Emergency Management have documented evidence from countless sources like 5 year old Jimmy Thomson who said “Katie has cooties.”

read more

He Profits So You Can Save: When Jesus saves, he is also getting a really good deal!

Dec 15, 13 He Profits So You Can Save: When Jesus saves, he is also getting a really good deal!

All through the streets people are cheering with glee, as they trample each other for flat screen TVs.
Just as Jesus intended, people are flocking to their local retailers for discounts you would literally kill for.

read more

NSAnta KNwOS BEST

Dec 15, 13 NSAnta KNwOS BEST

At just five years of age I looked up to my father, stared him straight in the eye and said “you are Santa.” I spent the rest of those years not believing until one day

read more

NSA Proof Typewriter Compromised Through CALM-ED in Lieu of the Queen

Nov 15, 13 NSA Proof Typewriter Compromised Through CALM-ED in Lieu of the Queen

Hallikey collects $15 trillion from a Blackhole to answer the call to recent demand for typewriter ribbons.

read more

Masses in the streets, multikulti reacts calmly to even deeper conspiracy

Oct 15, 13 Masses in the streets, multikulti reacts calmly to even deeper conspiracy

Sales of typewriters skyrocket from the shelves of thrift stores due to NSA hysteria.

read more